My Love, My Life
by AngelE777
Summary: Wolf's Rain: Snapshots of Hubb and Cher's relationship prior to the events in the anime. A new chapter 7 and a revised chapter 8, enjoy! Please read and review!
1. The Last Favor

Hi! I've decided to write a Wolf's Rain fanfiction. My favorite characters in the show are Hubb and Cher, so I decided to write a story focusing on their past together.  Enjoy!

This piece is from Hubb's point of view, sentences in quotes are dialogue, those not are Hubb's thoughts or observations.

Disclaimer: Wolf's Rain and its characters are the property of their respective owners.  This piece is not for profitable purposes.

My Love, My Life 

__

Chapter 1: The Last Favor 

"Hubbbbb!  Hubbbbb!"

I inwardly sigh, I was hoping that she wouldn't find me.

"Marion," I say as she weaves her way through the crowd towards me.  How unlucky I am, first my parents 'strongly recommended' I go to this party for my own 'enjoyment,' which actually translates to, to find a 'good wife,' and now I have to speak with this annoying friend of my mother's.

As she approaches, I see she is wearing her usual flashy attire with ostentatious jewelry. Marion is new money, and makes it glaringly apparent.  

She moves closer to me than I would like and says, "Hubb, how _have_ you been?"

"Very well, Marion, and yourself?"

She sighs noisily and says, "Oh, so very, very busy. You do know how I am on just _so_ many boards for charities, all the fundraising events, it's just exhausting!"

"It's a wonderful thing that you're doing, helping so many people."

"Well, I just keep telling myself that," she says as she laughs. 

I shake my head yes but remain silent, hoping that the conversation may be over.

"And how is your dear mother doing, it's been too long since we've had lunch."

"She's doing well, Marion, thank you for asking."

"Oh, I must give her a call, she's such a dear."

"Hmm.  And your husband?"

"Busy, busy indeed.  Speaking of husbands, Hubb, when are you finally going to be one?"

I shouldn't have asked.

"Well, I'm not seeing anyone at this moment, actually."

Her eyes light up and she clasps her hands together, this is _definitely_ a bad sign.  My parents have been trying to set me up for years; I've been to arranged meetings, singles parties, and even blind dates.  It seems to me that they have been one terrible disaster after another, I don't even want to try anymore.  Tonight is the last favor like this I'll be doing for them, that's definite.  

"Hubb, there is someone here you just _have_ to meet."

Here we go.

"Oh, really?"

She shakes her head violently yes.  

"Her name is Cher Degree, she's a scientist, she has her PhD, though I don't really know in what, but she does do some sort of research.  I know her aunt, another lovely woman, of course, I am only friends with good types, you know what I mean, Hubb."

I find it hard not to roll my eyes, oh great, some boring and mousy bookworm, I'm sure. 

"Marion, I really…"

She interrupts, I'm guessing she had predicted what I was going to say, "Wait here, Hubb, I'm going to go look for her."

"Marion, wait," I say, but she has already left me stranded.  Now alone, I begin to consternate, should I make a hasty exit?  I sigh, I would never hear the end of it from my mother if I snubbed Marion.  Admitting defeat, I drink my entire glass of vodka on the rocks, hoping it will sooth the agony.  A few minutes pass, and Marion has not returned.  Is it possible that she got sidetracked and has completely forgotten?  I smile in gratitude and decide that I've had some good luck this evening after all.  

Overjoyed, I start making my way to the exit when I hear, "Hubbbb!"

I freeze and flinch, oh, just wonderful.  She gives me a surprised look as she moves towards me.

"Where were you going, Hubb?"

"You hadn't come back yet, so I was going to look for you." 

She smiles and says, "Tsk, tsk, how impatient you are, you must really want to see her."

Hardly!

"Now, do come this way, Hubb,"

Suppressing another sigh, I answer, "Of course, Marion."

People stare at us as she pushes her way through the crowd and continues to talk loudly, how embarrassing.

"Cher is such a _lovely_ young lady, and simply _gorgeous_, I'm sure you'll be _enchanted_."

I nod my head but say nothing as she continues to pour out praises.

After walking for a little while, even though I have been silent, she says, "Shhh, she's up right ahead."

I shake my head yes and start mentally preparing myself.  I'll do my usual routine, 'Hello, it's a great pleasure to meet you…I am a police officer, an inspector, and you…how wonderful…I hope that you have an enjoyable evening, it was very nice speaking with you.'

"Cherrrrr, Cher, dear!"

I am about to step forward but halt suddenly as the most beautiful woman I have ever seen turns around to face Marion.  _That_ is Cher Degree? I stare at her, dumbstruck, hair a perfect shade of blonde, sparkling blue eyes, and a countenance that effuses grace and elegance, can a woman like this really exist?

"Cher, dear, this is the gentleman of whom I was speaking previously," she says as she grasps on to my arm, trying to force me from the spot where I have frozen. 

Marion gives me a strange look and hisses, "Hubb!"

At last being jilted back into reality, I step forward, freeing myself from Marion's grip, and finding myself before her, completely at a loss as to what to do or say next. She tilts her head slightly and graces me with a slight smile.

She slowly and carefully extends her hand as she says, "Good evening, I am Cher Degree, it is a great pleasure to meet your acquaintance."

In an uncertain and jerking motion, I shake her hand and respond, "Good, good, evening, Dr. Degree, I'm…Hubb Lebowski, and…the pleasure is all mine."

Oh, that was just _awful_!  I must have sounded like a complete idiot!

"Cher, dear, Hubb is an inspect-tor with the police, isn't that thrilling?"

I am unable to prevent myself from blushing, Marion's 'rescue' is just making this worse.

She looks at me and responds, "That does sound very interesting, Inspector."  
"It's really nothing that exciting, Doctor."

I feel surrounded by an extremely awkward atmosphere as we stand in silence.  I look to Marion, but see that she has drifted off into the crowd, leaving us alone. 

Desperately wanting to break the silence, I ask, "Are you – enjoying your evening, Doctor?"

She steps closer and says in a hushed tone, "Not really, Inspector, I find these functions to be rather tiresome."

I grin broadly and respond, "I completely agree."

She tilts her head again and says, "Actually, I was planning on leaving when Marion came up to me."

I chuckle and she gives me a questioning look.

"Marion, she had my captive for a while."

She covers her mouth with her hand as she laughs quietly.

"Marion and my aunt are bridge partners, whenever I'm at my aunt's home and Marion is there, she always asks me if I'm engaged."

I shake my head in exasperation and smile, "That's exactly what she was doing to me just now."

She turns her face away, frowns slightly, and has a faraway look in her eyes as she says, "None of the men that I've met have understood the love I have for my research."

Realizing that she is not talking to only herself, she blushes as she looks back at me.  I am about to say something when she glances down at her watch. 

She looks at me again and says, "You'll have to excuse me, Inspector, I'm going to my laboratory early tomorrow, so I really must be leaving."

Trying extremely hard to mask my disappointment, I respond, "I see, Doctor."

She holds out her hand, this time, with less formality.  She smiles and says, "It was very nice meeting you this evening, Inspector."

With a more firm and determined motion, I take hold of her hand and shake it as I say, "It was wonderful meeting you as well, Doctor."

In the shred of time before she turns, I have an intense internal struggle, I want so much to see her again, but I have no idea how she would respond.

My thoughts are broken as she says, "Good evening, Inspector."

At the last moment, fear of rejection overcomes my better judgment, and I blurt out, "Good evening, Doctor."

She nods her head and starts to the exit.  When she is out of sight, I realize what a mistake I have made.  I, Hubb Lebowski, am a complete and utter fool; I have fallen in love in just one night, and I have no clue if I will ever see her again.  No longer caring about what the people think, I laugh aloud at the situation in which I find myself.

  


	2. Tea and Coffee

Hello, here's another chapter, hope you enjoy it!

Disclaimer: Wolf's Rain and its characters are the property of their respective owners.  This piece is not for profitable purposes.__

Chapter 2: Tea and Coffee 

I look again anxiously at my calendar, three weeks, three weeks since we met, and nothing.  Countless times I've reached for the receiver to call Marion, but I always stop myself, knowing that involving her would, at best, complicate things, and, at worst, ruin any small chance I may have.  I look at myself in the mirror before taking my hat and putting it on as I exit through my apartment door.  I lock up and proceed quietly to the entrance.  I step outside and, after a short debate, decide to walk to the station.  Again, as has been the pattern since that evening, my thoughts return to her, what she said, how she looked, and her laughter.  I frown, I have never been in a situation like this, so - unsteady, like the world has lost its balance.  Yet, despite this feeling of aggravation and frustration, I still would not want to give up what I have gained.  

A rusty car with a faulty muffler passes by, it is not unusual, but I find it bothersome because it has interrupted my thoughts.  Already distracted, I continue to look along the road and at the other side of the street.  I see a café with tables outside, and I notice something that grabs my attention, a woman alone at one of the tables.  I watch as she alternates between sipping from a cup and writing on a pad, could that be?  Overflowing with hope, I walk blindly in the street, narrowly avoiding being hit by a speeding car. I slow my pace as I approach the café, trying my best, but surely failing at it, I attempt to walk casually by the fence near the woman's table.  I am ecstatic when I realize that she is indeed Cher Degree.  She looks up from her pad and sees me there, and displays a look of surprise.

"Inspector Lebowski."

I feign surprise and respond, "Doctor Degree."

I remove my hat and hold it in my right hand, and place my left hand on the fence as I lean in slightly.

"How nice to see you again, Doctor."

She smiles and responds, "The feeling is mutual, Inspector.  Are you on your way somewhere?"

"Yes, I decided to walk to the station today."

"I see, that's nice. I decided to stop and have some tea and take notes before I go to my laboratory."

I nod my head in acknowledgment. Another silence looms, and I begin to debate again about what I should do or say.  She has been kind to me and often smiles when we talk, could those be indications or am I reading too much into this?  

"Inspector, is something wrong?" she says with a questioning look on her face, my emotions must have been written across my face.

I involuntarily blush, and respond, "No, no, I'm fine."

As I look at her, I decide that I'm not going to let myself get into the same situation twice, I _am_ going to ask her.

"Doctor?"

"Yes?"

"Would you happen to be free this Saturday evening?"

My stomach churns as I see a range of emotions play across her face, surprise, uncertainty, sadness, and embarrassment.  She looks down at the tea in her cup momentarily, before lifting her head to look at me once more.  Knowing what her response will be, I wish that I had remained silent.

"I, I'm sorry, Inspector, I think that you are a very nice person and I enjoy spending time with you, but I'm not sure that it is a good idea.  My research is very important to me and…"

Unable to control myself, wanting to end this for both of our sakes, I feign a smile and interject, "Doctor, please don't be worried about this, I understand."

Not looking overly convinced, she looks at the tea again as she says, "I'm sorry."

Wanting escape, I force myself to glance at my watch and say, "I'd better be going, I hope that you have a pleasant day, Doctor."

She quietly answers, "You as well."

I glance once more at her, place my hat back on, and walk the remainder of the way. 

"Lebowski, you want coffee?" Adamson shouts.

I look up from a pile of papers and respond, "Sure, thanks."

I've been unable to concentrate, the events of this morning keep repeating in my mind, continuous jabs of the pain of rejection.  I put the papers down and look out the window behind my desk, why did it have to be this way?  I finally found a person that I love, to have my hope torn to shreds.  I sigh and return to my work, knowing that I can't spend forever regretting, as painful as that is to admit.  Soon after, Adamson walks through the door with the coffee.

"Here you go."

I nod and say, "Thanks."

"Oh, when I walked out, someone was talking to the receptionist, wanted to see you."

"Ok, thanks for letting me know."

"No problem," he answers as he walks out the door. 

I take a sip of the coffee and then pick up the receiver to ask that the person be sent in, even though I'd rather not deal with anyone today.  I lift up the cup once more to my mouth and hear the door open.  I almost choke on the coffee when I see who it is.

I hastily put down the cup, stand up, and say, "Doctor Degree."

She walks over to my desk, but remains standing. 

"I, I realized I made a terrible mistake today, Inspector."

She looks at me, her expression anxious, while I remain stupefied by her presence and words. 

She continues, "To be honest, I had wanted to say yes, I find you to be charming and humorous, but I was weary – because of my experiences in the past. However, I realized that I shouldn't let those prevent me from seeking happiness in the present."

Barely able to speak I am so excited, I say, "Then, then you would like to?"

She smiles and shakes her head yes.  I grin broadly, overjoyed by this great moment.


	3. Dinner for Two

Hi, hope you enjoy this chapter, too!

Disclaimer: Wolf's Rain and its characters are the property of their respective owners.  This piece is not for profitable purposes.

Chapter 3: A Dinner for Two 

For the thousandth time, I look at myself in the mirror, satisfied, but still nervous, I pick up my keys and make my way out of my apartment. We had agreed to meet at the restaurant at eight, I glance at my watch and see that I'm late, in fact, if I don't hurry, I might not make it in time.  I swear loudly and walk quickly to my car.  

As I drive, obstructions and other problems in the road delay me even more so that, when I arrive, I am already fifteen minutes late.  Visibly sweating, I step into the restaurant, worried that she might be angry or have already left.  I scan the waiting area, and see her standing, with her hand resting on the pane of a window that she is looking through.  She must not notice me, because she remains watching.  

I walk up to her, and not wanting to surprise her, I say quietly, "Doctor Degree?"

Still somewhat startled, she removes her hand from the window and turns towards me.

"Inspector Lebowski."

"I, I'm very sorry, I'm late Doctor, believe me when I say I didn't want to be."

She smiles and answers, "It's fine, Inspector."

I look at her more carefully, tonight she is wearing a black cocktail dress and a pearl necklace, she looks more beautiful than even that evening. 

"I let them know that I was here and that you were coming, I think that our table should be ready."

Startled, I say, "Oh, that sounds good, thank you."

She laughs quietly, which confuses me.  

Before I can say anything, she says, "Shall we go?"

I shake my head yes and follow her as she walks behind the hostess.  When we arrive at the table, I move quickly so that I can pull out a chair for her. 

She at first looks surprised but then smiles as she says, "Thank you, Inspector."

I then pull out my own chair and sit down.  She looks at me, and I can't help but blush. 

"How, how was your week, Doctor?" I ask, trying to break the ice.

"I had a good week with my research, thank you, and yourself?"

"It was fine, thank you."

Silence looms once more, worrying me, but she seems rather calm. Indeed, she sips from her water glass and opens a menu.  I decide to follow her lead and scan the menu.  I wasn't sure what she likes, so I had chosen a restaurant that I thought had a broad range of dishes. I pick out what I am going to eat quickly, and watch as she leisurely reads and makes her choice. 

After she places her menu back on the table, I say, "Did you see something you liked, Doctor?"

She smiles and nods her head yes. 

I grin and respond, "That's good."

When the waiter arrives, I order wine. The server returns soon afterwards and, after I test it, pours the wine for us.  Not sure whether to toast or not, I decide not to lift my glass.  I watch as she sips the wine and then places it back on the table. 

"Is it to your liking, Doctor?"

"Of course, it's excellent," she answers. 

She displays a slightly mischievous smile, which surprises me.

"How long have you had the pleasure of knowing Marion, Inspector?"

I chuckle and respond, "I first remember her coming to our home when I was a child, she and my mother have known each other, I think for most of their lives.  She wasn't too bad at first, rather quiet, if you can imagine that.  She was a young widow, her husband died of an illness.  Things changed though when she got re-married, she and my mother started to grow apart, but, they still try to maintain their friendship, even today."

She nods her head thoughtfully and responds, "I've only known her for a few years. My aunt is relatively well off, and enjoys so-called 'high society,' at least, what exists of it today.  She first met Marion at a charity function, and they've been friends and bridge partners ever since."

I grin and say, "You know, I told my mother just last week, 'I refuse to go to anymore of those silly parties.'  She was _furious_.  It was strange, usually in that type of situation, well, I wouldn't have said that in the first place, but, if I had, after listening to her, I would have apologized profusely. But, this time, it was different, it was so simple to brush aside her criticism."  
She laughs quietly and I blush, realizing I really shouldn't have said that.  I am rescued by the salad arriving, which we eat in silence.  

Not long after the salad plates are cleared, our entrees arrive.

Without thinking, I loudly blurt out, "Looks delicious!"

Realizing my blunder, I glance at her and see her smiling.  

"It certainly looks much better than anything I've ever prepared.  I'm afraid my cooking skills are lacking," she says.

I smile and answer, "My cooking skills are composed of dialing and ordering."

She laughs again, slightly louder this time.  

She decides not to order dessert, so, after I pay the bill, we go to the exit and walk outside.  

I am about to say something when she says, "I had a lovely time tonight, Inspector, thank you."

"No, no, the pleasure was all mine, Doctor, thank you so much for joining me."

She smiles slightly and surprises me by taking hold of my hands and saying, "I hope that we'll be able to see each other again soon."

She then leans more towards me and says, "Please, call me Cher," before kissing me.

When she draws back, I am still in shock, did that _really _happen?  

Noticing my surprise, she smiles again and says, "Good night, Hubb."

I remain frozen as I watch her walk towards her car.  Before she gets in, she turns around to wave, and somehow, I am able to wave back. 


	4. Our Decisions

Hello, here's another chapter.

Disclaimer: Wolf's Rain and its characters are the property of their respective owners.  This piece is not for profitable purposes.

Chapter 4: Our Decisions 

I smile as I watch her, sitting sideways across my lap with her arms encircled around my neck.

"Cher, was there anything you wanted to do today?"

She looks away from me with a thoughtful expression.

She turns her face towards me and replies, "It's been a while since we've simply walked together in the park."

I shake my head yes in agreement.  While I remain still, she unwraps her arms and gets up so that she is standing before me. 

I smirk and say, "Help me up."

She gives me a quizzical look, but then smiles and holds out her hand.  I place my hand in hers but make no movement to get up, which surprises her. 

She leans forward with a mischievous expression and says, "Well, if _that's_ the way you're going to be," before pointedly dropping my hand and turning around.  

I do not move and remain silent, and, soon after, she turns her head so that she is looking at me again.  She sighs and then laughs and turns back to me and holds out both of her arms, which I take, though I use mostly my own effort to get up.  I release her hands and then embrace her.  As we stand silently, I decide that tonight will be the night.

She steps back and says, "Shall we go, Hubb?"

"Of course," I respond as I hold out my arm, so that she interlaces hers with mine.  

We walk together out of my apartment and onto the sidewalk.  There is an old park nearby where I live that we have been to before, so I lead us there.  Our walk is mostly in silence, but we have been together long enough that I no longer worry about it.  Cher is always full of life, but does not always express it in words.  Even now, she actively scans the scenery, pausing her sight on things that catch her interest. 

When we arrive at the park, she moves her arm away and walks ahead of me.  She notices the bench that we often use when we come here, and rests her hand against it.  I watch as her hair and dress drift in the slight breeze.  She turns her head so that she is looking at me and smiles, and I smile in return. I approach and stop when I am standing near her.  She takes hold of my hand and smiles before starting to walk.  I suddenly start sneezing, oh, wonderful, there must be a dog around.

She looks at me worriedly and says, "Hubb, are you all right?"

I take out my handkerchief and hold it in my hand as I say, "It's this terrible dog allergy, I think I may have told you about it before."

While I sneeze more into the handkerchief, she responds, "Yes, I think I recall this happening before, actually, right in this park."

We look around and see a man walking a dog.

"Why don't we walk this way, Hubb?" she says as she points in the direction opposite of the dog. 

"All right," I say, though I am somewhat startled, because, when I look at her, her expression seems somewhat annoyed, I wonder why?

After walking together for a while, Cher looks at me and says, "We should probably be going, Hubb, we don't want to be late for tonight."

I nod my head in agreement, and we return to my apartment.  She then drives back to her apartment while I return inside mine.  I walk to my desk and open the drawer, and take out the small box that I placed there recently and open it.  I glance at it momentarily, and then shut it, but, this time, place it on top of the desk.  After I change and am ready for the evening, I pick up the box again and place it in my right pocket. 

Cher and I had planned to meet again at the event, and I walk towards her as she approaches.

I stand before her and say, "Cher, you look beautiful this evening."

She blushes slightly and smiles as she looks up at me and says, "Thank you, Hubb."

I take hold of her hand and we walk into the ballroom.  A person walks by with a tray of champagne glasses and each of us takes one.  We clink our glasses together in a toast and take a sip.

I move closer to her and smirk as I say, "I didn't think I'd ever be back at one of these again."

She smiles slightly and nods her head in agreement.

I take hold of her free hand and say, "But now, I'm happy to be here, Cher, because I'm with you."

She responds, "I feel the same way, Hubb."

In a less serious tone, I say, "Do you think Marion will be here this evening?"

"I spoke with my aunt yesterday, I understand that Marion has fallen ill, so will be unable to attend, she's 'dreadfully' upset about it."

"What a shame," I answer with a grin, causing Cher to laugh quietly. 

After cocktails and dinner, a band begins to play near the dance floor. 

"Cher, would you like to dance?"

"All right," she answers with a smile.  

I escort her to the floor and hold her close as we begin to dance silently.  After a few songs, I decide that it is the appropriate time, and I move away slightly.  Surprised by my action, she looks up at me with a questioning look.

"Cher, why don't we go outside?"

Still looking confused, she responds, "That's fine."

We hold hands and walk outside.  When I think we're a good distance away, I take her other hand, and she looks up at me in surprise.

I breathe deeply and say, "Cher, this time with you has been the happiest of my life, and I hope that you feel the same way."

Realizing what I will be saying next, her facial expression turns to one of surprise.  I remove my hands from hers and take the box out of my pocket, and open it in front of her to reveal the ring.

"That's why I'm asking you, Cher, to please be my wife."

Tears begin to flow down her face, and she moves her hand to wipe them away. 

She smiles through her tears and says, "I will, Hubb."

Overjoyed with her response, I remove the ring from the box and place it on her finger.  She looks at it and then embraces me, which I happily return. 


	5. Our Wedding

Hi, sorry about the delay, here's the next chapter.

Disclaimer: Wolf's Rain and its characters are the rightful property of their respective owners.  This piece is not for profitable purposes.

Chapter 5: Our Wedding 

I look over the task list once more, and then turn my head so that I am looking at her. "We're all set for tomorrow, Cher."

She glances over my shoulder and then nods her head yes. 

"I'm so glad that this day is finally arriving."

She responds by smiling and taking hold of my hand. 

I smirk and say, "I'm sure Marion will be making a big deal about her role in this."

She laughs quietly and says, "Yes, I think you're right about that."

"Our new place looks great."

She nods her head yes.  Not sure if I should broach the subject, but, wanting to know, I decide to bring it up.

"Cher, have you decided yet what you'd like to do about your name?"

"I've thought about and, considering that Degree is recognized in my profession, I've concluded its best to not change it."

Trying to mask my disappointment, I respond, "All right, that sounds fine."

I decide I won't let it bother me, what's most important, of course, is that we'll be together.

I look at myself in the mirror one more time.  This is it, as of today, Cher and I will officially be husband and wife.  Momentarily freed from my nervousness, I smile at my reflection.  I glance at my watch and realize that it's time to go, so I head to my car and make my way to the ceremony.

Anxiously, I wait for her at the altar.  At last, the music begins, and I watch as she slowly processes down the aisle.  She looks more beautiful than ever in her gown, and we smile at each other as she approaches, her veil covering her face.  Our guests clap, but I hardly hear them as I watch her, as she looks down slightly.

I smile as I say, "Cher, you look very beautiful."

She looks towards me and her eyes widen as she smiles.  The ceremony continues, and, as we exchange vows, I know that all this is for real.  I lift up her veil and lean in to kiss her. 

Our guests clap and throw rice in the air as we exit, and shout their well wishes as we enter to the car to go to the reception.

I hold her hand as I say, "I'm so happy, Cher, I love you."

She grips my hand, smiles calmly, and responds, "I love you, too, Hubb."

Continuing to hold hands, we continue in silence to the reception. 

When we arrive, we have pictures taken in and outside the building.  Afterwards, as we enter the reception hall, our guests clap and cheer again as I escort Cher to our table.  The flowers on all the guests' tables complement Cher's arrangement.  I scan the room and am pleased with how it was decorated. 

She turns to me and says, "It's beautiful, isn't it Hubb?"

I smile and nod my head yes.  

After a toast, together, we walk from table to table, greeting our guests and thanking them for coming.  I take a deep breath when we arrive at a certain one that I had been dreading.

"Cher dear, Hubb!"

Cher steps forward and Marion grabs hold of her hands.  I notice that Marion is wearing a loud and billowing red dress, which I assume cost an exorbitant amount. Curious, I glance over at Marion's husband, I had heard his health is poor, I can imagine why.  When I glance at him, I notice he seems tired, again, I'm sure I can guess the cause.

"Oh, Cher, dear, you look _gorgeous_!  Of course, you _always_ do, but today even more than _ever_."

Amazingly composed, Cher responds, "It's very kind of you, Marion, thank you so much for attending, I know how busy you and your husband are."

"Dear, I _couldn't_ miss this, after all," she says, and then looks around the table and loudly continues, "I _did_ introduce you two, after all."

Wanting to rescue Cher, I step forward and answer, "For which we are _eternally_ grateful, Marion."

She smiles broadly at me and waves her hand as she says with a snort, "Well, I _am_ a philanthropist!"

I repress a sigh and steal a glance at Cher, who seems to be doing the same. 

Realizing that no one finds her joke humorous, Marion quickly changes the topic. "Cher, dear, is your aunt here?"

"Yes, Marion.  Would you like me to ask her to come visit you at your table?"

"Oh, no, that's not necessary, I'm sure she'll be looking for me."

Cher seems unsure how to answer, so I interject, "Marion, my mother is here as well."

Marion turns to me and says, "How _wonderful_."

Not wanting to be there any longer, and guessing Cher feels the same way, I say, "It was very nice seeing you this evening, Marion."

Cher nods her head and smiles.

Marion grins and says, "Oh, of course, it's _always_ nice to see such _lovely_ people, you go and enjoy yourselves."

"Excuse us, then," Cher says as she tips her head slightly forward.  

I bow and then take hold of Cher's hand as we move away from the table. I grin mischievously at Cher, whom I can tell is trying to suppress laughter. 

After we finish greeting and then eat, Cher and I step onto the dance floor for the first dance.  The lights are dimmed and we move together in silent candlelight. I hold her close, so thankful for this day. As the song finishes we separate slightly and smile.  The other guests join us, and with intermittent breaks, we dance for hours. 


	6. An Opportunity

Hello, here's another chapter, enjoy.  I have an author's note at the end.

Disclaimer: Wolf's Rain and its characters are the property of their respective owners.  This piece is not for profitable purposes.

Chapter 6: An Opportunity 

I watch, seated at the couch, as Cher feeds her bird.  I bought it for her for our first anniversary, I smile as I remember how excited she was to receive it.  

As she comes back inside, I say, "Cher, we haven't been to the art museum in a while, why don't we go today?"

She sits down beside me and takes hold of my hand as she says, "That sounds like a nice idea, Hubb."

I smile and nod in agreement as I stand up.  I hold out my hand, she takes it, and I help her up.  

While she waits by the door, I pick up my keys.  
"Shall we go?" I ask. 

"All right," she replies.  

I open the door for her and wait as she walks through.  

We step into my car and, after I start the engine, I say, "I'm glad that we were able to have some time together on our anniversary, Cher."

"I'm glad, too, Hubb."

"What do you want to do for our third?"  I say with a grin.

She laughs quietly and answers, looking at me, "I think we have plenty of time to plan, Hubb, unless you're thinking of something spectacular?"

I look her and smirk as I say, "Who knows, who knows," making her laugh again. 

When we arrive, I wait for her on the sidewalk and take hold of her hand when she approaches.  Together, we walk to the entrance, where I open the door and we step through.  As she waits, I take out my wallet and make a donation.  I approach her and she clasps my hand.  We walk together towards the first room, and when we arrive, we break apart to admire the paintings separately.  I smile, glad that she seems to be enjoying herself.  After we finish seeing the art in the first room, we continue to the others.  At one point, I turn to look at her again, but notice that she is looking at the floor and looks troubled.  Worried, I walk over to her.

I place my hand on her shoulder and say, "Cher, is everything all right?"

Startled, she looks up at me and says, "Oh, it's nothing, I'm fine."

Unconvinced, I answer, "All right."

We continue, and she seemingly improves, but later, I notice her staring at the wall. 

This time, I take her hand and say, "Please tell me if something is bothering you."

She looks at me, and then slightly downwards, "The truth is, Hubb, I've been offered another research position, I would be leading a team."

Happy for her, I say, "Really, that's wonderful!"

She smiles momentarily, but then looks worried again, "I'm not sure what to do yet."

I lift up her chin and say with a grin, "Let's not think about it now, after all, we're here to enjoy ourselves, right?"

She smiles and says, "You're right.  Let's keep looking."

After this, she brightens and seems to enjoy herself more, which makes me glad. 

As we finish, she looks up at me with a smile and says, "Hubb, why don't we go for coffee and tea?"

I take hold of her hand and say, "That sounds like a great idea, Cher."

We step outside and I say, "Hmm, I think there's one around here."

"I know one nearby, this way," she says as she points.

"Ok," I say as she takes the lead.  She stops in front of a store and we walk inside.  Art decorates the walls and classical music plays.

"I would often come here, to take notes, to think, and to simply relax," she says with a slight smile.

"It's a very nice place."

She nods her head in acknowledgment and moves towards the counter to make her order.  After we get our drinks, we sit at the table that Cher often used. 

As she sips her tea, I ask, "Is there anything else you'd like to do, today?"

She thinks for a moment and answers, "No, I think it would be nice to stay at home, I could make dinner."

I must grimace because she says, "Or maybe we could eat take out."

We both laugh and I take hold of her free hand and say, "I'd rather have what you make, Cher."

She smiles calmly in return. 

When we arrive back home, I sit on the couch and start to read the paper while she paces and then leans against the couch.

"I was thinking again of the promotion."

"Hmm." 

"Hubb – what do you think?"

"Beats me.  I don't know anything about your professional stuff."

I put down the paper and turn my face to look at her.

"What about you?  You want to do it, right?"

"Yes, I think it's a good chance.  From where I am now, I can see the limit of my research."

Her head droops and she looks upset again. 

I take hold of her hand and move her so that she is seated on the couch.  

She looks away from me and says, "And I might have been in a bit of a slump."

"Slump? You?"

I lean towards her and say, "That's a first."

I smile and continue, "You're always lively."

She looks toward me with a surprised expression and answers, "Really?"

To her surprise, I take off her glasses and smile as I say, "Of course."

She turns her face from me again and looks down as she replies, "Maybe I wasn't thinking until now – of what I wanted to do."

She surprises me as she says, "Hubb, what about you?"

"What I want to do?"  I say as I think about her answer.

I smile and startle her by grabbing hold of her shoulders and laying her down on the couch, both of us laughing.  

"Do as you wish.  I'll always be with you."

She says nothing at first, but has a thoughtful expression on her face.  

After a few moments, she turns her face towards me and smiles as she says, "I'm going to accept it."

Author's Note: 

The English I used for the scene from the anime (episode 13) was translated by Solar & Aoshi fansubs, rightful credit goes to this group and its members. 


	7. A Shared Wish

Disclaimer: Wolf's Rain and its characters are the property of their respective owners. This piece is not for profitable purposes.

_Chapter 7: A Shared Wish_

"Cher?"

She closes the door to the birdcage and looks to me with a smile before she says, "Yes, Hubb?"

"Could you come inside for a moment?"  
"Oh, I'm done here, I'll be right there," she answers.

She steps inside and closes the glass door behind her. She seats herself next to me on the couch and I take hold of her hand, clasping it between both of mine.

She laughs quietly and says, "You're acting so serious, Hubb."

"There's something I've wanted to discuss with you, Cher."

She appears curious but says nothing.

I tighten my grip on her hand slightly and say, "Cher, have you – given any thought to having children?"

A look of surprise and then consternation crosses her face.

"There are times when I have thought about it..."

She pauses for a moment, and I am about to say something when she continues, "And – I never realized, Hubb, your interest in them."

Startled by her response, I answer, "I've felt for a while how wonderful it would be to share our happiness with a child. It's just that you'd never expressed any feelings about it."

She laughs quietly and says, "To think, neither of us has brought it up out of consideration of the other."

I laugh at this thought as well.

She looks away from me towards her bird, her expression serious and says, "Even though I've just begun with the new research, I still think this is a good time. By the time we had the baby, I'd be settled there and we would have arrangements for child care."

I place my hand on her cheek, causing her to turn her face towards me once more.

I say, "I know that you'd make a wonderful mother, Cher."

She blushes slightly and says, "I know you'd be an excellent father, Hubb."

She reads a multitude of books on the subject of child rearing, taking notes on a computer as she does so. I am at first surprised when I note Cher's dedication to this new pursuit, but soon realize that it is consistent with her personality. Sometimes she will call for me, and I am happy to share in the learning and to see her excitement at the prospects.

"Hubb, look here, at what it says in this book about how you can help your child learn to read."

I smile and move from the kitchen to sit beside her on the couch.

Still holding it, she moves the book so that it is perched between us, and uses the index finger on her right hand to point to a passage. She waits while I read.

After I finish, I look to her and say, "That sounds like good advice to me."

She smiles as she nods her head and then answers, "I thought the same thing."

Enjoying this, and knowing that she is too, I remain seated next to her, and we read the book together.

Some months pass without results. Cher's diligence increases, and eventually begins to worry me.

"What is it? I've read everything, followed all the recommendations. What could I be doing wrong?"

Concerned, I place my arms on her shoulders, startling her.

She looks back to me, her expression a mixture of frustration and sadness.

I turn her so that she is facing me, and embrace her, which she soon after returns.

There is a moment of silence between us as I stroke her hair slowly.

I pull away, but take hold of her hands before I smile and say, "It's a matter of time, Cher. Things will work out well, I'm sure of it."

She smiles slightly and says, "I know you're right, Hubb, I just need patience."

Although I hear her words, I do not believe that she is fully convinced by my reassurances.

As more time passes, Cher's level of anxiety about being childless actually declines. While I am glad that she is no longer allowing it to be a major source of distress, I am still concerned as I have noticed another development. Cher has always found satisfaction and purpose in her research, but it has never been central to her existence. However, lately, there have been instances in which she has been distracted. Also, her words and thoughts often seem to center around her work. Is it possible that these two events are connected or is there something important I am not noticing – or both?


	8. Dissolution

Hello, here is the second-to-last chapter, enjoy.

Disclaimer: Wolf's Rain and its characters are the property of their respective owners. This piece is not for profitable purposes.

_Chapter 8: Dissolution _

I look at her from across the room, she has been sitting in the same position on the couch for what seems like hours. I frown, knowing of what she is likely thinking. I walk towards her and gently place my hand on her shoulder, which startles her.

As she looks up at me, I say, "Cher, why don't we go out, we could…"

"I'm sorry, Hubb, I need to organize my thoughts so I can start writing my report for Lord Oakum. The other researchers on the team are depending on me."

Before I can see any more, she looks away from me again, and I notice her watching her bird. Unsure what to do next, I move my hand away, and realizing, like so many times recently, that she wants to be alone, I pick up the newspaper off a table and walk to another room.

Noticing the silence at dinner, I wonder if I should try to start a conversation. She submitted her report to Lord Oakum's staff, but still seems preoccupied, and, in those rare instances when we've spoken, it is always about the same thing, Cheza, the life form that she is studying.  The pattern continues and grows that I had noticed as her concentration on having a child began to decrease.  Is it possible that Cher is trying to repress her wish for a child with her work – or even – that she is acting as if though Cheza is her child?

"Hubb?"

Surprised, but happy that she's speaking, I respond, "Yes, Cher?"

"I wanted to let you know that I'll be home less, at least for a short while, we're starting a new round of experiments. I'll have to monitor Cheza closely, so I'll be spending more time in the lab. Sometimes I may have to stay throughout the night."

I freeze in shock, she already keeps extending the time she has been working there, and now she might even be there all night?

"Cher, is that really needed? You've been spending so much time in the lab already."

"It's necessary to be sure that we collect all of the data, it's unknown when Cheza may have a reaction."

As if to signal that the conversation is ended, she looks down at her plate and continues eating.

I look up from the magazine that I am reading and notice Cher's bird. I realize that, since Cher didn't come home last night, it probably hasn't been fed since yesterday morning. I walk to where the food is kept, take some out, walk back, and feed it. After I finish, I turn around and look at the door, wishing that it would open, and that she would walk through, smiling and greeting me. But, of course, that doesn't happen.

Surprising me, I hear the phone ring. Thinking it may be Cher, I move quickly and pick up the receiver.

"Hubb?"

"Cher."

"I can't talk long, but I wanted to ask you if you could feed my bird."

"I realized it might be hungry, so I just did so."

"Thanks so much."

"You're welcome. Cher, are you…"

"I'm sorry, Hubb, I really need to go, good bye."

And, with that, she hangs up. Startled and disappointed, I put down the receiver.

More time passes, and I am worrying more about her. Her quiet spells are longer, and she is so often distracted. I have tried speaking with her about my concerns, but my words never seem to reach her. Now, I stand near the door, straightening my tie and getting ready to leave, and I see her there, with her bird perched on her finger. Her once sparkling blue eyes are now dull and it seems as if her mind is somewhere else. She lifts her arm and the bird flies away. I stop in mid-motion, knowing that I cannot let things go on like this any longer. She steps back inside and closes the glass door behind her. She faces me, but it seems as if she doesn't see me there. No longer caring if I'm late for my shift, I walk towards her and take hold of her hands.

"Cher, I'm worried about you – you don't seem well."

A few seconds pass before she responds, "I'm fine, Hubb, there's no need to worry."

Knowing that that can't be the truth, I embrace her and respond, "No, we both know that's not really the case. You've been working so much lately, I'm sure you're exhausted, and Cher, what about us?"

Hearing no response I say, "I feel like we've grown apart, Cher, and I don't want that. I want to spend time with you, talk with you, laugh with you, like – like we used to. And, Cher, what about our dream, to have a family?  I don't know exactly when things changed, I guess it's been over time."

She moves away from me and looks to the side and then back at me, with a frustrated expression.

"No, this isn't about any of that. The two of us, we're so different that…"

"Cher, please."

She looks sad as she says, "There are so many things that can never change."

Frozen in place, I watch as she approaches the door.

I turn towards her and say in an anxious tone, "Cher, where are you going?"

She stops in mid-motion, looking like she may turn around, but then continues through the door, leaving me in lonely silence.


	9. Drifting

Hi, this is the final chapter of "My Love, My Life," hope you've enjoyed it.

Disclaimer: Wolf's Rain and its characters are the property of their respective owners. This piece is not for profitable purposes.

_Chapter 9: Drifting_

I stand there in shock, watching the closed door for a few moments. After I recover, I walk towards the door, open it and step out to look for her. I search and find her in the stairwell.

"Cher."

She looks back at me, her expression blank.

"I'm going to go to the lab now, Hubb," she says, as she continues down the stairs.

I follow her silently, and am uncertain what to do as I see her enter her car. I decide to respect her wishes, and enter my own car to drive to the station.

I find it hard to do my work, and I half expect her to walk into my office, a surprise visit, like she would do sometimes before she had even heard of Cheza. My shift finally ends and I rush home, hoping that she will be there, but I find only darkness and quiet. She's most likely still at the lab, she'll probably be home later, at least, I want to believe that. I wait all night for her to return, but she does not. The sun rises and I move from the position in which I have been standing for hours. I decide that I will go to the lab before my shift to ask her to come home today. I quickly get ready and then drive to her lab. I walk inside but am stopped outside of the main research area by a secretary.

"Excuse me, sir, can I help you?"

"Yes, I'm here to see Dr. Degree."

"Who may I say is here, sir?"

Before I answer, she seems to remember something.

"I'm …"

"I'm sorry sir, the research team has asked not to be disturbed. You'll have to come back another time."

"When?"

She inspects a handwritten note in front of her, which I can tell is in Cher's elegant handwriting.

"The team has informed me that it will be for an 'unspecified' time period."

"All right," I answer.

I start to walk away, but turn around slightly and look at the door to the research area for a moment, before turning around once more and exiting.

I return to the lab after my shift, but receive the same answer. I find it hard to restrain myself from walking in despite the message, but I don't want to upset her even more, so I turn around and leave the building. Once again, she does not come home, and, as I exit the apartment in the morning, I begin to worry that she may never return. I stop again at the lab before and after my shift, but receive the same answer each time. As I drive home, I decide that, next time, I will insist that I speak with her, to hopefully prevent things from getting worse. When I step inside the apartment, it seems slightly different, though I'm not sure at first why. I walk around, and notice that some things seem to be missing, could we have been burglarized? But, I stop suddenly, no, the most expensive things have not been taken, which means…

I run to our bedroom and to the closet and open it quickly to reveal what I had expected, all of Cher's clothes are gone. I search throughout our home and see that, except for photographs, Cher has removed everything of hers, erasing her existence here. Unable to remain standing, I sit on a chair at the table and blankly watch the door. She made her decision, she's gone from my life, and I couldn't stop her. Can I even now? I smile sadly and realize that that is not likely, she has made up her mind.

The next few weeks, I vacillate between despair and denial. She never comes home or contacts me, and I have given up trying to see her in the lab. When I come home one day and see an envelope with a letter from a lawyer and divorce papers, I'm not sure whether to laugh at the ludicrousness of it, or to cry at the reality of it. I put the envelope down, and see another one behind it, addressed to me, from her. Uncertain whether I want to read it, I open it and look at it.

'Hubb,

I expect that this letter will arrive the same day as the papers. The turn of events upsets us both, but I understand now, and I believe you will, too, that the pain and sadness we bring each other apart is far less than that if we remain together. I implore you to acknowledge this fact.

Cher'

I stare at the letter, grasping its meaning. Cher has indeed given up, and has asked that I do the same. I pick up the other envelope again, take out the papers and a pen, and sign.

The divorce was soon final, and, not wanting to be haunted by memories, I ended our lease on the apartment and moved to a smaller one closer to the station. The few times I have spoken to her since the divorce, almost all of what she says is still about Cheza, and she ignores or argues against my requests for reconciliation.

I think about her again as I walk to the station, and, to my surprise, I see her, across the street, standing in front of a building with a group of people, possibly the other researchers. I stare, noticing her energetic speech, her smile, and the sparkle that has returned to her eyes. How can this be? I drift untethered while she forges ahead, confident and without – seemingly at least – regret. She notices me, and a look of surprise flashes across her face. She nods her head and smiles slightly, but then returns to her conversation. I try to understand her actions, I want so much to believe that this is not the end. I decide that I will not give up hope. I know we _can_ try again, and find happiness together once more.


End file.
